sometimes, when you’re a mom, you have parts of you that come alive that you never knew existed. sometimes, you have moments of yourself that surprise you. sometimes, when you are a mom, you have parts of your heart grow & love in ways you never knew possible and can hardly grasp how you had in yourself what you see. your heart & love is alive in new ways, you never knew were there. but also — when you’re a mom, you wonder what happened to some of the parts of you that just made you… you. today, i felt a little of the “old stacy” breathe. when i dove under a wave in crystal blue water. i felt so incredible to be in my little slice of the world. i felt like myself. my “old” self. and then i came out of the waves and dove straight into the “new” self (mom). it was a good feeling, a great feeling. they can come together. seems small – but it was big.
today i felt like the “old” me & the “new” me could be together & present…
it was a good day.
(all photos taken with my iphone)
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it’s quite possibly my most favorite part of photography – entering in to another’s space to photograph their essence, their energy, their loves.
i’m not doing a lot of shoots these days – but when i do, i come away so taken & humbled with entering in to a family’s space.
and this family – trust me… you too would love to come into these beautiful people’s space.
it’s warm there. it’s fun there. it’s silly there. it’s loving there. and it’s real.
but i didn’t just enter in here – i was welcomed in. and while there were many wonderful parts of this shoot, like the grandparents visiting california, a newly engaged son, and the other son with his fabulous family — my favorite part was when the sweet little girl looked up at me at the end of the shoot with those big brown eyes and asked to have a playdate sometime. how could i resist?!? i hope she’ll come over soon & see our bunny…
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)happy mothers day. in whatever shape it takes today.
in however you end up honoring motherhood, mothers, and being a mom.
my dear friend, who is so close to becoming a mom – sent this to me.
Before I was a Mom I slept as late as I wanted and never worried about how late I got into bed.
I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday.
Before I was a Mom
I cleaned my house each day.
I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn’t worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.
Before I was a Mom I had never been puked on.
Pooped on. Spit on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts…..
I slept all night.
Before I was a Mom
I never held down a screaming child so that doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.
Before I was a Mom
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn’t want to put it down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn’t stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.
Before I was a Mom
I didn’t know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn’t know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn’t know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn’t know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.
Before I was a Mom
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn’t know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mom.
much love today for the two little boys i get to mother.
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today felt like one of those days that you just are not on your “A-game”.
it felt hectic, frazzled, choppy.
it was interesting this afternoon around 4pm when i downloaded the majority of my ten on ten pictures to see the theme that had arisen. calm, soft, quiet photographs. simple ones. mostly of my boys or things that had caught my eye that were calming or beautiful. really the whole concept behind rebekah gough‘s “ten on ten” – to find those little moments of beauty throughout a day that may not seem “photo-worthy”. so i felt more at peace as we packed one simple little bag to spend the rest of this “beautiful” day watching the sun go into the ocean.
the beach – my most favorite spot in the world. we drove there and soaked in the salty air & all it’s goodness. i snapped a photo of the last sun as we walked to the car – even though i had gone over “ten hours”… because it’s too beautiful to not. and then… i felt thrown right back to the not so good places of feeling defeated/frustrated/overwhelmed… big sigh. you’ll see at the end…
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have a great week.
jump in some waves. or make some good ones yourself.
have fun & jump into some goodness this week! 
i’ll be blogging this fun photoshoot later this week… stay tuned. it’s a big one & a fun one!
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…i take pictures of the things that are,
the times that are,
& the ones that remind us it can be (or more-so at least).
(new singer/songwriter above – brett dennon)
neighbor gave him an old surfboard. big deal folks. big deal!
that’s pretty simple & pretty sweet.
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it is always such a humbling honor to be featured on someone else’s space or blog. today i have a little feature over at a new venture called The Mommarazzi School. (see post here) A great local company offering workshops & a community for other moms in love (or obsessed) with photographing our little ones.
in the guest post, i disclosed a little more about my photography philosophy, my vision for photography, what i love about taking pictures, and a little more about what equipment i use, why, & a little of the how.
in the past i offered workshops, but with the addition of my little kai i don’t do them anymore – so this will be a great referral spot for me!! and we are working out ideas and visions for how i can collaborate and partner a little more with them this year. so stay tuned, stay connected and check out their super grand business!
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but i have a ton of photos i can’t wait to blog — so stay tuned… until then, i’m enjoying my boys, my beach, and my days.
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